THE FUNNIES
" THE FUNNIES "
(Got some funnies let us know )
EVER WONDER WHAT HAPPENS
when you leave your computer on at night
Click on stick person and then play (has sound)
PROOF THAT OLD PEOPLE CAN THINK QUICK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw a state trooper behind him, lights flashing and siren blaring.
Take Time To Smile
- If walking/cycling is good for your health, the postman would be immortal.
- A whale swims all day, only eats fish, drinks water and is fat.
- A rabbit runs and hops and only lives 15 years.
- A tortoise doesn’t run, does nothing… yet lives for 450 years.
Perks of reaching 50 or being over 60 and heading toward 70!
2. In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.
5. People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.
7. Things you buy now won’t wear out.
10. You get into heated arguments about pension plans.
Sylvester And Tweety
Watch this until Sylvester catches Tweety.
After Tweety is caught, click continue reading
..(wait for it. It's worth it)...
This was an idiot test. How long did you watch?
0-2 seconds - There's hope for you
2-5 seconds - Having a bad day?
5-10 seconds - Are you maybe just a slow reader?
10-20 seconds - Remedial classes are nothing to be ashamed of
20-30 seconds - It is recommended that you don't breed.
30 sec-1 min - You probably can't read this anyway. So why bother?
1-2 min - The equivalent of the average house plant
2-5 min - Good afternoon Jessica Simpson
5 min -1 hr - Dead people score in this range
1hr plus - Congratulations. You have a negative IQ. You are a Dimocrat voter and a prime candidate for Asshole of the Week.
To find out what your prize is, watch Bugs until he finishes his carrot...
50th High School Reunion....funny!!!
He was a widower and she a widow.
They had known each other for a number of years being high school classmates and having attended class reunions in the last 20 years without fail.
This 50th anniversary of their class, the widower and the widow made a foursome with two other singles.
They had a wonderful evening, their spirits high.
The widower throwing admiring glances across the table. The widow smiling coyly back at him.
Finally, he picked up courage to ask her, "Will you marry me?"
After about six seconds of careful consideration, she answered, "Yes,..... yes I will!"
The evening ended on a happy note for the widower. But the next morning he was troubled.
Did she say “Yes” or did she say “No?”
He couldn't remember. Try as he would, he just could not recall. He went over the conversation of the previous evening, but his mind was blank.
He remembered asking the question but for the life of him could not recall her response. With fear and trepidation he picked up the phone and called her.
First, he explained that he couldn't remember as well as he used to. Then he reviewed the past evening.
As he gained a little more courage he then inquired of her. "When I asked if you would marry me,
did you say “Yes” or did you say “No?”
"Why you silly man I said, ‘Yes. Yes I will.’ And I meant it with all my heart."
The widower was delighted. He felt his heart skip a beat.
Then she continued. "And I am so glad you called because I couldn't remember who asked me!”<!
Your Goverment $ at work !