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Ken Ortiz
Hello all,
Happy New Year and welcome to 2022! Hopefully 2022 will be a more normal (?) and sane year. Well, it might not start off that way, but hopefully (again) things will become more normal (?) as the year goes on. We are already starting off 2022 with a bang/roar with the snowstorm today around the Chicagoland area and frigid temps after. I had a feeling it was coming as our November and December was relatively tame weather-wise. One thing I do during this time of the year is to reflect on the year past (I actually had a little time on my hands over this holiday week) and also on some things/experiences that can be eliminated from my “bucket list". I will assume you all know what a bucket list is and maybe some of you have one of your own. I also think about some future things/experiences I would like to add to my bucket list. But I am also ruling out certain things like the following:
Things I will NOT put on my Bucket List:
Getting kicked off an airplane for idiotic behavior (and/or for assaulting crew members/passengers). Skydiving is an acceptable “bucket list" item because I would be choosing to get kicked out of the airplane voluntarily while in mid-air (and hopefully I have on and know how to operate a parachute).
Performing any kind of TikTok challenge that may cause injury/hospitalization (or worse), or that may result in criminal charges. Are there any TikTok challenges that won't result in any of the above?
Taking any kind of selfie in a keep out/no trespassing area, or where there is imminent danger, for example while hanging off a cliff, while inside a gorilla or lions cage at the zoo, etc.
Performing donuts (intentionally) on a major interstate highway or street (no matter what time of day or night). Of course, certain weather may cause unintentional donuts. Also includes participating in “street races".
Porch Pirating. But would that count when packages that are not mine are delivered to my house by mistake and I kept them? This happened to me last week when there were packages addressed to houses down my street that were delivered to my house. I did not keep them though and was a good neighbor and delivered them myself to the other houses, so technically I did not qualify as a Porch Pirate. Did the Amazon driver think my house was the drop-off point for packages for the rest of my block? Did I somehow get hired as an Amazon package deliverer? Maybe our local driver just did one of those “I hate my job and I quit" moments that you hear about a lot lately. I imagine that if I was busted by the cops with packages that were not mine in my possession while I was going down the sidewalk, my statement of "I was not stealing them, I was just returning them to the correct houses because they were delivered to my house by mistake!" would be another of those instances where I totally told the truth, but would not be believed and the officer would reply with "Sure you were, uh-huh" while he was handcuffing me.
Performing any rants or no-no's (including “smash and grabs") that may cause a viral video of me posted from a store's camera or having a viral video taken of me posted by someone showing me acting like a “Ken"(male version of a Karen). Also a post on the web from a server showing that I did not tip well, or did not treat him/her well, etc. I do my best to adhere to store policies and treat merchandise with care and appreciate and treat well the folks I come in contact with at grocery stores, restaurants, etc. And I always tip very well (lesson learned from my Mom as she spent time as a waitress and had to deal with a lot of BS, etc). The worst thing I can imagine is myself being known as "A Bad Tipper/Mean Person". "Careful, servers! Here he comes! That bad tipper/mean person! BOO! HISS! A pox on ye!"
Having my picture (identified as “UNSUB XX") on one those ATF posters offering rewards for information on Persons of Interest in Civil Unrests. A few of those posters were out after our 2020 riots here (here is one of them shown below). No, my picture was NOT on any of those posters.
Any suggestions on what other items we should NOT put on our bucket lists?
P.S. - I should also add "No Florida Man" behaviors. Hopefully, you would know what that means. If not, Google: florida man meme meaning
Have a Happy 2022 and be safe and be well!

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