Three Californian surgeons were playing golf together and discussing surgeries they had performed.

One of them said, "I'm the best surgeon in California . In my
 favorite case, a concert pianist lost seven fingers in an accident, I
reattached them, and 8 months later he performed a private concert for the Queen of England."

The second surgeon said, "That's nothing. A young man lost an arm and both legs in an accident, I reattached them and two years
later he won a gold medal in track and field events at the Olympics."

The third surgeon said, "You guys are amateurs. Several years ago a woman was high on cocaine and marijuana and she rode a horse head-on into a train traveling 80 miles an hour. All I had left to work with was the woman's hair  and the horse's ass. I was able to put them together and now she's Speaker of the House."