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Kay Manning (Elrod)
ANOTHER GREAT EMAIL FROM A HOMEBOUND FEMALE!
The world has turned upside down. Old folks are sneaking out of the house, and their kids are yelling at them to stay indoors!
- You think it’s bad now? In 20 years our country will be run by people home schooled by day drinkers.
- This virus has done what no woman has been able to do … cancel all sports, shut down all bars, and keep men at home!!!
- Do not call the police on suspicious people in your neighborhood! Those are your neighbors without makeup and hair extensions!
- Since we can’t eat out, now’s the perfect time to eat better, get fit, and stay healthy. We’re quarantined! Who are we trying to impress? We have snacks, we have sweatpants – I say we use them!
- Day 7 at home and the dog is looking at me like, “See? This is why I chew the furniture!”
- Does anyone know if we can take showers yet or should we just keep washing our hands???
- I never thought the comment “I wouldn’t touch him/her with a 6 foot pole” would become a national policy, but here we are!
- Me: Alexa what’s the weather this weekend? Alexa: It doesn’t matter – you’re not going anywhere.
- Can everyone please just follow the government instructions so we can knock out this coronavirus and be done?! I feel like a kindergartner who keeps losing more recess time because one or two kids can’t follow directions.
- I swear my fridge just said “what the hell do you want now?”
- When this is over … what meeting do I attend first … Weight Watchers or AA?
- Quarantine has turned us into dogs. We roam the house all day looking for food. We are told “no” if we get too close to strangers, and we get really excited about car rides.
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