And then the fight started!!!!

After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social

Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's license to

verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at home.  

I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and come back later.  

The woman said, 'Unbutton your  shirt'. 

So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair.  She said, 'That silver

hair on your chest is proof enough for me' and she processed my Social

Security application.  When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my

experience at the Social Security office.  She said, 'You should have

dropped your pants. You might have gotten disability, too'

           And then the fight started.....

  

********************************************************************************

My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion, and I kept

staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a nearby

table.  My wife asked,  'Do you know her?'  'Yes,' I sighed, She's my old

girlfriend.  I understand she took to drinking right after we split up those

many years a go, and I hear she hasn't been sober since.'  'My God!'

says my wife, 'Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?'

           And then the fight started.....

  

********************************************************************************

I rear-ended a car this morning. So, there we were alongside the road and

slowly the other driver got out of his car.  You know how sometimes you just

get soooo stressed and little things just seem funny?  Yeah, well I couldn't

believe it.... he was a DWARF!!!  He stormed over to my car, looked up at

me, and shouted, 'I AM NOT HAPPY!!!'  So, I looked down at him and said,

'Well, then which one are you?'

           And then the fight started... .

********************************************************************************

A woman is standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror. She is not happy

with what she sees and says to her husband, 'I feel horrible; I look

old,  fat and ugly. I really need you to pay me a compliment.'    The

husband replies, 'Your eyesight's damn near perfect.

And then the fight started...

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