Spokesman Review: Tuesday Sep 14, 2004

Funeral Mass for Casey Cavanaugh Condon, 33, will be today at 10 a.m. at St. Peter's Roman Catholic Church. Hennessey-Smith Funeral Home is in charge of arrangements. Mr. Condon, who was born and raised in Spokane, died Thursday of sarcoma. He attended Lewis and Clark High School and later moved to Seattle. He worked as a logger, equipment operator and foreman and was a member of Electrical Workers Union Local 77. He worked for Wilson Construction and Condon Bros. Inc. After his son's birth in 2000, Mr. Condon returned to Spokane to raise a family. He enjoyed golfing, fishing, boating and spending time at his family's lake place at Hayden Lake, Idaho. Survivors include his wife, Amy; a son, Jacob Condon; his stepmother, Mary Ann Condon of Spokane, three brothers, Dan Condon of Spokane, James Condon of Seattle and Tom Condon of Olympia; and two sisters, Maggie Condon of Spokane and Meagen Smith of Seattle. Memorial contributions may be made to the Casey C. Condon Benevolent Fund, 4913 S. Ferrall Spokane, WA 99223.

Casey’s Eulogy

given by Rendall Farley

Tuesday, September 14, 2004

Saint Peters Catholic Church, Spokane

I guess as you get older death becomes something you have to face more and more. I don’t know if it ever gets any easier, but I don’t think anyone here could have imagined a few years ago that Casey would be leaving us this soon – this death is very hard to accept. And it makes it especially hard I think, to say goodbye to someone so young, so full of life and laughter and heart, and with a beautiful young family. But in the years ahead I think it will be easier to just be grateful for the time we did get to spend with him – and instead of sadness, the first things that can come to mind will be happy thoughts, things that make you smile and feel good.

Casey was a true, lifelong friend to me. I first met him when my family moved a few houses down from his old place on High Drive and Grand in the early seventies. We ended up spending a lot of time together growing up, and I got to know him very well, like a brother. Both our Dad’s were a little too hard on us at times – sometimes we realized it was for our own good, we knew they loved us and we loved them back – but sometimes it wasn’t easy and Casey and I were there for each other. We encouraged each other to make the best of things, and most of all to make sure we had a good time along the way.

For me one of the first things that comes to mind about Casey and always makes me laugh, is the way he liked to stir the pot with people that were taking themselves or something way too seriously. He was a lot of fun to be around, and he was always a master at pushing people’s buttons and getting them fired up, if and when they needed it. I think he may have gotten some of this from his older brother Danny, but mostly I think he was just born with this skill because I saw it very early on & I was often the recipient of it myself. Casey always knew one of the most important things in life was to enjoy things for what they were – and never take anything or anyone too seriously. I think it was his way of having fun, and at the same time sort of helping someone to realize how ridiculous they were being.

In our old neighborhood, we were surrounded on all sides by a lot of grumpy older people that didn’t seem to like little kids, or anything else for that matter except maybe tending to their lawns all day. They were taking themselves and their lawns way too seriously. None of them seemed to like us at all, and they would really overreact and get into hysterics when we had to step on their finely groomed property to get an overthrown ball or some other minor infraction. We took a lot of verbal abuse for those first couple years until we decided justice and self-respect demanded retribution. Out of respect for this place and this occasion I won’t go into any details, but let’s just say that over the course of many years a lot of our grumpy neighbors got an order of magnitude more than whatever trouble they ever gave us or deserved. Now, being a homeowner myself it all doesn’t seem so funny, and as something of a penance I guess, there’s been a few kids here or there causing minor annoyances around my place, and I have never said a thing to any of them and never will. It’s just not worth 10 years of firecrackers blown up on your porch in the middle of the night or something far worse.

Part of me likes to think we grew out of all that but it’s not completely true. Last year I was riding in Casey’s truck on some errand, and he pulls over in a residential neighborhood, rolls down the window and pulls out a pack of bottlerockets from the center console. He asks me to hold them pointed at this seemingly random house as he lights them. Now I haven’t been back in Spokane yet for very long and I had no idea who’s house this was, but what’s so bad about a few driveby bottlerockets right? So I hold them up and we launch them out of his truck window at the house. As he’s slowly driving off he’s kind of chuckling to himself and says it’s his sister Maggie’s house, and that he does this just about every time he drives by – Maggie did he ever fess up to this with you?

I think it’s a good thing to stay young and light at heart, and Casey certainly did that. But he also really stepped up to the plate, matured and took on greater responsibilities – for himself, and also as a father and husband. In the face of great difficulty, instead of giving up or giving in, he chose a more difficult path of greater personal responsibility. He looked in the mirror and chose to be happy and grateful, to live every day without excuses or complaints, and to give his love for life beyond himself to others. I cannot express how much I respect that, the example he showed all of us. This last month he gave a letter to his brother Tommy who shared it with me, this was a letter he wanted to write for his nephew Matthew about what it really means to grow up and become a man. In the letter he said to remember if you wanted to be treated like a man, you needed to act like one, and that meant honoring and respecting your family, your marriage, your relationships, and taking pride in your profession – what he felt were essential building blocks to real satisfaction in your life and enjoying every moment of it.

Casey was a great friend to many, one of the most generous people I’ve known. He had a gift for finding humor in just about anything, and letting you know when you were taking something (or yourself) too seriously. He dearly loved his family, the Hansen side of the family, and all his 100-plus Condon cousins. His brothers and sisters meant the world to him, and he would do anything for them, and for his friends, at the drop of a hat. Many of us heard some of these stories and what they meant to everyone at his Celebration of Life gathering a couple weeks ago.

A long time ago I read something that stuck with me, from a poet who said that "As you look back upon your life, you will find that the moments when you have truly lived, are the moments when you have done things in the spirit of love."

That’s a simple concept, but it means everything . . . Not only about simply saying what is most important in life, but the fact that all of us instantly recognizes the profound truth of this statement deep in our hearts – it is planted there like a seed in each and every one of us from birth. It speaks to the way that we sometimes look back at our own lives and think about what our lives really mean, what we have done – what we could have done – and what kind of legacy we will leave when we are gone. It speaks to what we recognize as what is most noble and beautiful in our humanity. We can each look back on our lives and remember things that show we are not always true to our best nature – but there are many more that show that we ARE true – and we feel best about those that are! Deep down we are driven to become better, to take the best things from our parents and others that give us love, to shape and mold it inside ourselves, and then give it again, back to others. This is what is good and best in us, this is our greatest attribute – not intellect, not worldly achievement. This is what best defines our humanity. And through it – living and doing things in the spirit of love – is the only way that we can collectively survive.

And that’s what Casey’s life and his death will remind us of. You get back what you give to others. The people in this church here and now are a testament to that.

Before he left us, I asked Casey if there was anything he wanted me to say, to speak for him. He said that the biggest thing was that he couldn’t imagine going through what he did without Amy beside him. Her strength and loyalty kept his spirits high, encouraged him to fight his cancer with every ounce of strength and optimism he had, and her sacrifices allowed him to enjoy his last few years, to spend a lot of time with their son Jake. Their marriage, their son and Amy’s love were priceless to him – he felt he could never thank you or say he loved you enough Amy. But he wanted me to say that he will always love you – and more than anything he hopes that the years ahead will be filled with happiness for you and Jake – that with time the hurts will heal, and you will mostly remember him with a happy smile, and feel good.

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