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Seems we have all lamented here about getting older. I came across this "tribute" to women over 50 by Andy Rooney that I thought might be a fitting post. Later. ******* 60 Minutes Correspondent Andy Rooney (CBS): As I grow in age, I value women over 50 most of all. Here are just a few reasons why: ·A woman over 50 will never wake you in the middle of the night and ask, ‘What are you thinking?’ She doesn’t care what you think.. ·If a woman over 50 doesn’t want to watch the game, she doesn’t sit around whining about it. She does something she wants to do, and it’s usually more interesting. ·Women over 50 are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant. Of course, if you deserve it, they won’t hesitate to shoot you if they think they can get away with it. ·Older women are generous with praise, often undeserved. They know what it’s like to be unappreciated. ·Women get psychic as they age. You never have to confess your sins to a woman over 50. ·Once you get past a wrinkle or two, a woman over 50 is far sexier than her younger counterpart. ·Older women are forthright and honest… They’ll tell you right off if you are a jerk, if you are acting like one… You don’t ever have to wonder where you stand with her. ·Yes, we praise women over 50 for a multitude of reasons. Unfortunately, it’s not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed, hot woman over 50, there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 22-year old waitress. Ladies, I apologize.. ·For all those men who say, ‘Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free? Here’s an update for you. Nowadays 80% of women are against marriage. Why? Because women realize it’s not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage!

02/08/10 02:46 PM

#1260

Kathy Carter (Campbell)

What a beautiful Monday! Hope all of you had a good weekend.

Gail, I heard that George did show up. Hope you enjoyed it.

We have been singing "When the Saints Go Marching In".

Hey, Teresa, I saw you are signed in now.Let us know about the weather up there on your mountain.

Diane, are you and Dick snowed in?

Hey Connie, I had a stomach bug yesterday and didn't get to attend church, still a little today , but feeling much better. Hope you enjoy your concert.

Gary, I like most of those comments about women over fifty.

We have a busy week ahead. I have a dental appointment on Wednesday and Rabun has to go to the cancer center for bloodwork on Friday before seeing the oncologist next Tuesday.

Kay, Ray. hope you had a good birthday.

Hey Judy. Let us hear from you.

Don, I hope you had a good "bachelor" weekend.

Hope all of you have a great week.

02/08/10 03:46 PM

#1261

WHILE WE'RE ON THE TOPIC OF AGE TODAY HERE IS A CHECK
FOR ALZHEIMER'S.
THE FOLLOWING WAS DEVELOPED AS A MENTAL AGE ASSESSMENT
BY THE SCHOOL OF PSYCHIATRY AT HARVARD UNIVERSITY...
TAKE YOUR TIME AND SEE IF YOU CAN READ EACH LINE ALOUD
WITHOUT A MISTAKE.
THE AVERAGE PERSON OVER 40 YEARS OF AGE CANNOT DO IT!

1. This is this cat.
2. This is is cat.
3. This is how cat.
4. This is to cat.
5. This is keep cat.
6. This is an cat.
7. This is old cat.
8. This is fart cat.
9. This is busy cat.
10. This is for cat.
11. This is forty cat.
12. This is seconds cat.

NOW GO BACK AND READ THE THIRD WORD IN EACH LINE FROM
THE TOP DOWN AND I BETCHA YOU CANNOT RESIST PASSING
IT ON-------

02/08/10 04:30 PM

#1262

This day is almost history and I wanted to share a little wisdom so it won't be a total loss.

Have a GREAT evening. Later.

02/08/10 06:51 PM

#1263

Ah, Gary, that little story about the dog got to me. I love dogs and miss mine so much. You earlier little ditty about women over 50 was great, and it made me hopeful that maybe some of them were true. And Jim, your entry was hilarious! That's what keeps me coming back here, I guess. I never know if I'm gonna read something sweet and touching, or wildly funny. I just know I always enjoy it.

Don, I'm glad you started the memory lane forum. I'm loving it. It's funny to me that many of your memories are also mine, but then again, some I have never experienced. Connie, after all those nights we spent with each other, and deep talks we had, I don't remember ever hearing about "rallying worms". We are deep vessels just full of stories yet to be told.

Kathy, sorry you have been under the weather, but glad you're better, sweetie. Hope both yours and Rabun's appts. go well this week.

It was -2 degrees when I went to water aerobics this morning. I felt like a nut, but there were lots of other nuts in the water with me. We have snow on the ground, and now they are predicting up to 9 more inches by Wed., with drifts up to 3 feet. Dick managed to fly back to Philly today, so here I am again all by my lonesome again.

Actually enjoyed the Super Bowl last night. It was a good game, and I can't help but be happy when an underdog wins.

Love from flaky Ohio,
Me

02/08/10 08:39 PM

#1264

Gary and Jim - great entries!

Diane and Dick, please come on back to Georgia before you freeze up there. It's cold here, but nothing like there.

I talked with Teresa Burt's little sister, Marie tonight. Their class is beginning to plan a reunion for June, and she said she's loved what she heard about ours. Said she had talked with Gary today about setting up a website. Fun!

I enjoyed the ballgame, and loved seeing Drew Breese with his little boy after the game. Personally, I did not enjoy the halftime show.

I hope you all have a good week.

02/09/10 12:10 AM

#1265

Kathy Carter (Campbell)

Gary, liked your story about the dog.

Jim, I liked your little cat humor. By the way, I didn't know you have already had reached sixty.

Diane, tell Dick I loved the memories he wrote about. Glad we don't have those temps and snow here.

Connie, I never knew you called worms out of the ground.

Well, I see that Teresa didn't post anything when she was logged in earlier when I visited the site on Monday. Teresa, do you have ice or snow up there?

02/09/10 09:21 AM

#1266

Good Morning, folks.

Kathy... my "bachelor" weekend was fine, but it sure was good to have Liz back home. She did not get snowbound in Chattanooga and they all had a good time.

By the way... Connie, it sounds like you had an exciting church service Sunday with Coach Richt visitng and his son singing for the congregation. We had some excitement of a different sort in our church Sunday. We were near the end of the service, just beginning to serve communion when there was suddenly a big commotion in the pews over on the left side of the sanctuary. We soon realized that someone was having a real medical emergency and a request was made to find "a doctor in the house" and 911 was called. We all began to pray for this person, and then church was dismissed. EMS personel arrived and were still administering CPR when I left. I never did know who it was, man or woman, or what the problem was until last night. I received news that it was a young man in his forties who was there alone and suffered a massive heart attack and died. They were never able to revive him, even after 45 minutes of CPR at the hospital. And they had a real problem contacting next of kin too. Very sad. Not the kind of excitement you want in your Sunday church service.

And then, after church Sunday, I went to my favorite Chinese buffet for lunch. I was sitting there alone, eating too much, when suddenly there was a big commotion at a table nearby. People swarmed around this little girl who was seriously choking, and some guy was giving her the Heimlich Maneuver! Fortunately it worked and the little girl was fine, but I was beginning to wonder what in the world was going on with emergencies at church and then the restaurant too. Enough excitement for one day... and that was before the Super Bowl even began.

Have a good week everyone. Looks like more wet weather on the way.

02/09/10 01:03 PM

#1267

Boy Don, I'm not sure I would have wanted to be around you on Sunday. Seems like a lot was happening around you. So sorry to hear of the death of that young man. Glad to hear a good outcome with the choking child.

Diane, I've seen a few green shoots of daffodils pushing up thru this cold ground. I always think of you.

I'm afraid I am a "grey" as this day today, so will close for now. Maybe a good joke would help guys.

02/09/10 01:17 PM

#1268

I know what you mean Connie. I was beginning to wonder if maybe I should call Liz and warn her about coming home to me. But I guess things are fine now... no drama since then.

02/09/10 01:20 PM

#1269

Your wish is my command:

A blonde walks into the police department looking for a job. The officer wants to ask her a few questions....

Officer: What's 2+2?

Blonde: Ummmmm... 4!

Officer: What's the square root of 100?

Blonde: Ummmm... 10!

Officer: Good! Now, who killed Abraham Lincoln?

Blonde: Ummmm... I dunno.

Officer: Well, you can go home and think about it. Come back tomorrow.

The blonde goes home and calls up one of her friends, who asks her if she got the job.

The blonde says, excitedly, "Not only did I get the job, I'm already working on a murder case!"

Later.

02/09/10 01:28 PM

#1270

thanks!

02/09/10 03:04 PM

#1271

I needed a joke too, Connie, so thanks Gary. Don, I do hope your pretty Liz is soon home. Dick is stranded in Philadelphia. He was supposed to be there until tomorrow night, but because of the additional 20 plus inches of snow they are due to get, business is called off. He just called to say all flights are cancelled so he's stuck there. It stinks, but at least he's in a warm hotel and not the airport. We've gotten several more inches today, so I am socked in too. I'm just enjoying seeing the cardinals and jays fight at the bird feeder. Poor things.

Here's my attempt at a joke y'all. My brother sent it to me.

Sitting together on a train was Obama, George Bush, a little old lady, and a pretty, busty blonde. The train goes into a dark tunnel and a few seconds later there is the sound of a loud slap.

When the train emerges from the tunnel, Obama has a bright red hand print on his cheek. No one speaks.

I miss y'all.

I miss y'all.

The old lady thinks:
Obama must have tried to grope the blonde in the dark, and she slapped him.

The blonde thinks:
Obama must have tried to grope me in the dark, but missed and fondled the old lady instead, and she slapped him.

Obama thinks:
Bush must have groped the blonde in the dark. She tried to slap him, but missed and got me instead.

George Bush thinks:
I can't wait for another tunnel, so I can smack Obama again.

02/09/10 03:08 PM

#1272

In my preceding joke, I misplaced the term "I miss y'all". I tried to edit and add that to go at the end, but obviously I goofed. See, not only can I not TELL a good joke, I can't even WRITE one!

02/09/10 04:09 PM

#1273

LOOK DIANE THAT WAS GREAT! IT WAS BETTER THAN GARY'S. I
LOVED IT!!!
YES KATHY, I'M 60---MY BIRTHDAY IS 12/7 SO I COULDN'T START SCHOOL UNTIL THE SEPT AFTER MY 6TH BIRTHDAY. DOESN'T MATTER, I'M JUST PROUD TO BE HERE. EVERY MORNING I THANK THE GOOD LORD THIS FOOLS MADE IT THIS FAR! AND BESIDE LOOK AT WHAT I WOULD HAVE MISSED IF I HAD STARTED SCHOOL THE YEAR BEFORE YOU GUYS!
DON, I THOUGHT I HAD SEEN AND HEARD EVERYTHING, BUT THAT CHURCH TALE TAKES IT ALL. I GUESS IF YOU GOT TO GO YOU
CAN'T GET MUCH CLOSER THAN HE WAS!!!
GOT TO GO CATCH LATER!!!!
AFTER-A-WHILE

02/09/10 04:09 PM

#1274

I liked the joke Diane. Very good! And I kinda liked the "I miss Y'all, I miss Y'all" in the middle of it too. :-)

02/10/10 08:37 AM

#1275

GOOD MORNING MATES!!!
HERE'S ONE TO START THE DAY WITH---

THE CLOCK

A MAN DIED AND WENT TO HEAVEN. AS HE STOOD IN FRONT OF
ST. PETER AT THE PEARLY GATES, HE SAW A HUGE WALL OF CLOCKS BEHIND HIM.

HE ASKED, "WHAT ARE ALL THOSE CLOCKS?"

ST PETER ANSWERED, "THOSE ARE LIE-CLOCKS. EVERYONE ON
EARTH HAS A LIE-CLOCK. EVERY TIME YOU LIE THE HANDS ON YOUR CLOCK WILL MOVE."

"OH", SAID THE MAN, "WHOSE CLOCK IS THAT?"

"THAT'S MOTHER TERESA'S. THE HANDS NEVER MOVED, INDICATING THAT SHE NEVER TOLD A LIE."

"INCREDIBLE," SAID THE MAN. "AND WHOSE CLOCK IS
THAT ONE?"

ST PETER RESPONDED, "THAT'S ABRAHAM LINCOLN'S
CLOCK. THE HANDS HAVE MOVED TWICE, TELLING US
THAT ABE TOLD ONLY TWO LIES IN HIS ENTIRE LIFE."

"WHERE'S PRESIDENT OBAMAS CLOCK?" ASKED THE MAN.

"OBAMAS CLOCK IS IN JESUS' OFFICE. HE'S USING IT
AS A CELLING FAN."

AFTER-A-WHILE

02/10/10 09:17 AM

#1276

“IT’S A BEAUTIFUL MORNIN’”… ahhh… I think I’ll go outside a while… an jus’ smile…”
(The Young Rascals, 1968)

Well, with the east coast covered up in a blizzard, I hear that the Federal Government will be shut down today for the third straight day… and may be closed for the rest of the week. You may not agree, but I think that is probably a good thing. I believe that Americans might be better off when Congress is NOT in session... and when Obama keeps his mouth shut (Jim).

Have a beautiful mornin’ Class of ’68!

02/10/10 07:31 PM

#1277

Jim, I liked the joke.

Oh Diane, is Dick still snowed in??? Are you doing o.k.? I liked your joke too. :)

Don, I like that Young Rascals song too!
Funny you menioned Congress not being in session. When I heard that on the news this a.m., the first thought that came to my mind was 'that maybe that was good - at least they wouldn't be doing any harm...'

Take care and stay warm..

02/10/10 08:02 PM

#1278

Yep, Connie, Dick is still in Philadelphia. The airport there is closed completely. He is downtown, and he said they told people who worked there to find a place to spend the night in their office building. He's on the 17th floor of his hotel. He's able to work from his computer, but I can tell he's ready to come home. He hopes to get out tomorrow, but who knows. He said it was snowing like crazy. I am good. I have been in my fuzzy housecoat most of the day. I thought about getting dressed, but then thought "why?". I look like the stereotypical cartoon housewife, complete with fuzzy slippers. No one's going anywhere, so what's the use? No one can get to my front door even if they wanted to. But, all's well, and we'll enjoy getting out when we do.

Lovin' the 60s songs, Don. Jokes? Those too. I actually have a couple, but I'm gonna wait until I get my confidence up before I try to tell them.

Diane

02/11/10 08:07 AM

#1279

GOOD MORNING MATES! BETTER GET OUT AND ENJOY TODAY,
SOUNDS AS IF MO-A-COMING! RAIN/SLEET/SNOW! AND THEY
SAY WE'S GOING TO GET IT! WHO'DA THOUGHT IT. ANYWAY
JUST 4 MORE WEEKS HUH!!!
AND CONNIE, I THINK IF WE WOULD RECALL ALL THOSE
IDIOTS IN WASHINGTON, THE WHOLE WORLD WOULD BE BETTER
OFF. I'M FOR JOINING THE TEA PARTIES AND GET RID OF
THE WHOLE BATCH!!!
DIANE, SORRY YOU'RE HOME ALONE---BUT AT LEAST YOU'RE
NOT HAVING TO DO ALL THAT WIFE STUFF! AND DICK YOU
STAY OUT OF TROUBLE WHILE YOU'RE SNOWED IN.--- IT'S FOR
THE BEST DIANE. YOU DON'T HAVE TO PRESS THAT LITTLE BLACK
DRESS AND STUFF. REMEMBER--- WHAT HAPPEN NINE MONTHS
AFTER THE GREAT BLACK0UT! COULD BE DANGEROUS YOU KNOW---
ANYWAY, HAVE A GREAT DAY MATES!!!
AFTER-A-WHILE

02/11/10 08:32 AM

#1280

Well, guys... I have no good jokes to share. I will leave that to Gary and the rest of you.

So, Diane... just how much snow do you have on the ground up there in Dayton? They say that snow is headed to Georgia tommorrow afternoon, but I think it will be just a few flurries here in Marietta over toward Athens. It's supposed to be heavier south of here down in Jim's neck of the woods around Eatonton and Macon. Good golfing weather there Jim. You may need to paint those golf balls red.

02/11/10 08:47 AM

#1281

By the way... if any of you get snowbound and get bored... try this little exercise. Sit up straight with your legs uncrossed and your feet on the floor. Now lift your right foot up off the floor and start rotating it in a CLOCKWISE motion until you get comfortable doing it. While rotating the foot, take your right hand and write the number "6" in the air. Now check out your right foot. It will now be going in a COUNTER-CLOCKWISE motion. You can not stop it from reversing. Try it.

02/11/10 08:54 AM

#1282

Happy sunny Thursday! I'm always amazed at what animals can teach us. For instance, if a dog was the teacher you would learn things like:
When loved ones come home, always run to greet them.
Never pass up the opportunity to go for a joyride.
Allow the experience of fresh air and the wind in your face to be pure Ecstasy.
Take naps.
Stretch before rising.
Run, romp, and play daily.
Thrive on attention and let people touch you.
Avoid biting when a simple growl will do.
On warm days, stop to lie on your back on the grass.
On hot days, drink lots of water and lie under a shady tree
When you’re happy, dance around and wag your entire body.
Delight in the simple joy of a long walk.
Be loyal.
Never pretend to be something you’re not.
If what you want lies buried, dig until you find it.
When someone is having a bad day, be silent, sit close by, and nuzzle them gently.

Later.

02/11/10 08:55 AM

#1283