Message Forum

Tomorrow is Kentucky Derby Day in Louisville. Judging by Liz's family up there, they have all been partying for the last two weeks. As always, Liz and I will tune in to the "greatest two minutes in sports," and she will shed a tear when they play "My Old Kentucky Home." And then we will watch the race and root for the horse we've picked, based solely on which horse's name we like the best. That's enough to know that we would not be good gamblers. Anyway... She has picked a horse named "Make Music For Me" (a 50-1 shot) and I have chosen "Awesome Act" (a 10-1 shot). And... they're off!

The Derby might be more entertaining than my Braves have been lately... they stretched their losing streak to 9 games yesterday. Agonizing! It's like watching "Murphy's Law" on the diamond. They have been on the road but will be here in Atlanta this weekend. Maybe a little home cooking will help.

Looks like the rain is on the way, so stay safe and dry. Have a great weekend folks, whether you are horsing around or doing something else.

Reporting live from Braves Country... this is Don.

04/30/10 01:43 PM

#1510

Yeah Don, consistency is overrated ... but seems to be the best you can say for the Braves these days. Maybe a little time at home will give them an attitude adjustment.

One of the neatest places I think I ever visited was Churchill Downs. They had a multi-media show in a rotunda that just blew my socks off. The parts of Kentucky we traveled through were beautiful. Gotta get back there some day.

Been working hard the last couple of days planning a major event and getting some leases updated for the county. The hardest part was getting started. I would say it was spring fever but had the same symptoms in Jaunary. Guess I just need a big dose of motivation!! Anyway I hope you all have a blessed weekend (and the Braves will too). Here's a little funny to get it off to a good start. Later.

********

A nursery school teacher was delivering a station wagon full of kids home one day when a fire engine with lights flashing and a wailing siren at full blast zoomed past. Sitting in the front seat next to the driver of the fire engine was a Dalmatian. The children, never having seen a dog in a fire engine before, started to discuss what the dog might be for.

"They use him to keep crowds back," said one youngster.

"No," said another, "he's just for good luck."

Several more ideas were put forward and an animated discussion soon ensued when a little girl who had sat quietly throughout the discussion and deep in thought finally brought the argument to a close...

"They use the dog," she said firmly, "to find the fire hydrant."

05/01/10 11:57 AM

#1511

GOOD MORNING MATES,

ITS A GREAT DAY IN DAWG COUNTRY TODAY FOLKS. THE BIG QB OUT

OF N.C. HAS COMMITTED TO PLAY AT GEORGIA IN THE CLASS OF 2011.

THIS KID IS 6'02'' AND 200 POUNDS AND WAS ONE OF THE HIGHEST

RATED QB IN HIS CLASS. SO GOOD LORD WILLING LOOKS AS IF OUR

DAWGS ARE BACK ON THE RIGHT TRAIL!!! THIS KID IS A GOOD CHRISTIAN

KID NAME CHRISTIAN LEMAY! IT'S A NAME THAT WE SHOULD HEAR

A LOT OF GOOD THINGS FROM DOWN THE ROAD.

HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND FOLKS!!! BRAVES WIN! BRAVES WIN!!!

AFTER-A-WHILE

05/03/10 08:44 AM

#1512

Well a WET welcome to a new week! Sounds like a good sports weekend. Braves win and Dawgs in the hunt with a good QB - now if we can just keep him outta the bars! Very busy weekend so I'm happy to return to work where I can get some rest. Most of you have contributed to the "Bucket List" so when I ran across this list of ways to kick it, I just had to share it. I hope you all have a very BLESSED week! Later.

*****************

Every year nearly 120,000 people die from accidents, although over 2/3 of them occur from vehicle collisions and poisonings, there are plenty of other unusual ways people kick the bucket. Here is a selection of weird fatalities for one year, taken from the most recent government statistics.

Weird death

05/03/10 09:24 AM

#1513

Gary, thanks for getting my week off to a great start by showing me many ways I might die. I have come close with some of them, especially # 6. Ah, those were the days.

We had a soggy weekend, but today is sunny and bright. Hope you don't get the rain that poor Nashville has.

Oh, as many of you know, Mrs. Lila Shackleford died recently at 101. Lots of us remember her. When I was little she was our truant officer. Fortunately she never had to visit me, but she did visit my cousin Wayne Black one day. He had stayed home, but recovered quickly and was outside playing. When her car pulled up, he ran inside and jumped in bed with his cowboy boots on, and stayed there while she visited. Just like something Opie might have done in Mayberry.

Hugs. Stay safe and dry.

05/03/10 02:47 PM

#1514

Oh Diane - my purpose wasn't to illustrate ways you may die, but to help you avoid some of the final bucket kickers. For instance, 344 died by "Drowning/submersion while in or falling into bathtub". I now ONLY shower and thus avoid drowning in the bathtub. Like wise to avoid "Ignition or melting of nightwear", (6), I sleep in the nude. You for instance might avoid "Ignition/melting of clothing or apparel" (97), by NOT WEARING THAT LITTLE BLACK DRESS! (Jim told me to add that one)! Later.

********

On the opening day of the season, a baseball scout brings a race horse with him to add to the starting lineup.
The coach asks, "What the heck did you bring that horse here for?"
The scout replies, "Wait until you see him bat."
All the players are laughing, until the horse comes to bat. At this point, the horse grabs the bat, and everyone quiets down. They stare at the horse.
The pitcher, just shrugs his shoulders, and throws the ball toward home plate, when astonishingly, the horse hits the ball deep in the outfield.
The horse just stands there and does not move. The manager then yells at the baseball scout to tell the horse to run to first base.
The scout looks back at the manager and yells back, "If he could run, he'd be at Churchill Downs!"

05/03/10 04:08 PM

#1515

HELLO FOLKS,

DON I WANT TO TRY TO UNDERSTAND HOW I, LITTLE OLE innocent ME,

GOT PULLED INTO THIS CORRESPONDENCE BETWEEN GARY AND DIANE. WHILE

I'M DOING MY BEST TO TREAD WATER HERE! I MEAN WHAT'S UP WITH DAT!!!

GARY, I HEARD THEY COULDN'T WEAR "LITTLE BLACK DRESSES" ANY MORE!

BECAUSE OF THE FEAR OF SPONTANEOUS COMBUSTION! MAN, IF UNDER CLOTHES

ARE SPONTANEOUSLY COMBUSTING, WHAT IS US TO DO?! I MEAN THAT PUTS

VICTORIA COMPLETELY OUT OF BUSINESS. I GUESS WE NEED TO START BLAMING

OBAMA FOR PUTTING ANOTHER INDUSTRY GIANT OUT OF BUSINESS. MAN!!! THIS

IS SERIOUS BUSINESS!

BRAVES WIN!!! BRAVES WIN!!!

05/04/10 10:54 AM

#1516

Sorry Jim. I just thought it would be fun to trip Diane's trigger and I know that little black dresses trip a lot of triggers. We are drying out here in the Classic City today and the sun is shining and the birds are singing. "Oh what a beautiful morning, Oh what a beautiful day, I've got the stranges feeling, Everything goin' my way!" DON"T I WISH!!!! But till things show signs of going south, I'm gonna just keep enjoying the blessings. Hope everyone is having a blessed week. Later!

05/04/10 12:36 PM

#1517

KA-BOOM,Gary! That's my trigger. I tell you, that's what I get for trying to make a humorous little joke about something I thought we could all identify with, and you go and try to start trouble. And bringing poor, innocent- as- the- driven- snow Jim into it too. Sorry, Jim, I know you must have been terribly hurt. (wink, wink)

Speaking of ways to die, Gary. A week ago last Sunday I was walking through our fellowship hall after church, trying my best to tiptoe, seeing as a group of children and their parents were practicing a puppet show for an upcoming event and I did not want to disturb them, making this next part of the story ironic. Well, all of a sudden I felt myself starting to fall, and there was no stopping me. I didn't even have time to holler "Timber-r-r-r!" I fell with a thud. Windows rattled, ceiling tiles fell, and the richter scale registered 4.2. Two horrified young whippersnappers in their 40s ran to my aid, but I was already gathering my big, flustered self up off the floor by the time they reached me. I laughed it off, and went to find Dick--as usual. Anyway, I was fine, but did quickly develop a large, purple/black bruise on my hip. If the color was on a paint chip I would call it "angry spring clouds". Then, by nighttime, my side was getting sore. It got sorer and sorer. After consulting my internet physicians I diagnosed myself with a strained pectoral muscle, which has been hiding out for years until now. It's still sore as can be, but I am taking anti-inflamatory stuff for it. My internet specialist said to rest it, so all that means is I'm not going to water aerobics for a couple of days. Both of the nice fellows who witnessed it called the next day to check on me, so I guess the horrible memory of what they had seen was still haunting them. Thank goodness I was wearing slacks that day! So, to make a long story short, I will never tiptoe again in high heels.

There, that's my story. One more way you might die---tiptoeing on high hills.

05/04/10 02:12 PM

#1518

I DONE HEARD IT ALL! MEDICINE BEING PRACTICED OVER THE COMPUTER.

I KNOW OBAMA HAD A HAND IN THAT! WHERE'S THE NEED FOR PLAIN OLE

FASHION DOCTORS. WHAT DO THEY DO TYPE "AH" AND YOU STICK OUT YOUR

MOUSE! I MEAN COME ON FOLKS!

"ANGRY SPRING CLOUDS" THAT'S GOOD GIRL!

05/04/10 02:25 PM

#1519

"Type in 'AH' and stick out your mouse"???

Now that is FUNNY, Jim! :-)

Sorry about your fall, Diane.

Go Braves!

05/05/10 08:43 AM

#1520

Happy 5TH OF MAY to all you great Americans who are in this country LEGALLY... especially those of you who speak English. If you are not here legally... ADIOS, AMIGO!

05/05/10 10:37 AM

#1521

Oh Diane, my sincere apologies for using the phrase "trip" your trigger. I had no idea! I'm so sorry to hear about your fall. You know, "when you get to be our age" (a phrase I never thought I would live long enough to use) we have to be more careful. I guess the silver lining is, YOU WEREN'T WEARING A LITTLE BLACK DRESS! Sorry, I couldn't let that get by. Yes, Happy Cinco de Mayo Don. I noticed that it is also the birthday of one of the most influential individuals in American political thought today, Karl Marx. Happy Birthday Karl! Too bad your idiotic thought didn't die with you. Funny how some "brilliant" people keep subscribing to a failed philosophy. What is that phrase .... ah yes, the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result. With that I guess I should wind it up before I trip Don's trigger. I'll close with a little advice for Jim ... NEVER play golf with an undertaker. No matter how well you play, they always wind up on top at the last hole. I hope you are all haing a blessed week. Later.

05/05/10 12:09 PM

#1522

It must be karma! Or maybe its just me trying to make a point. Diane, please read and heed! You are more likely to die from a fall than riding a motorcycle or ..... ! Who would have thought?!? Something to consider on how you live your life I guess. Pardon me while I go increase my life insurance. Later.

***********

Odds are good that one of these things will get you. The National Safety Council has put together a list of the most common ways we collectively kick the bucket.

1. Heart Disease: 1 in 6

2.. Cancer: 1 in 7

3. Stroke: 1 in 28

4. Motor-vehicle accidents: 1 in 85

5. Intentional Self-harm: 1 in 115

6. Accidental poisoning: 1 in 139

7. Falls: 1 in 184

8. Car Occupant: 1 in 272

9. Assault by firearm: 1 in 300

10. Pedestrian: 1 in 623

11. Motorcycle rider: 1 in 802

12. Accidental drowning: 1 in 1,073

13. In a fire: 1 in 1,235

14. Pedalcyclist: 1 in 4,147

15. Air & space accidents: 1 in 5,892

16. Firearms discharge: 1 in 5,981

17. Exposure to excessive natural heat: 1 in 6,174

18. Exposure to electrical current, radiation, temperature & pressure: 1 in 9,412

19. Cataclysmic storm: 1 in 51,199

20. Contact with hornets, wasps, bees: 1 in 62,950

21. Lightning: 1 in 81,701

22. Bitten or struck (?) by dog: 1 in 119,998

23. Earthquake or other earth movements: 1 in 154,597

05/05/10 03:06 PM

#1523

Gary, you sure know how to cheer up a gal. Thanks for the list. I'll add it to my paranoia file. (You know we love ya, in spite of it all)

Don, I have not forgotten about us sharing some family history stuff. Well, actually I did forget, but I'll try harder to remember.

On a serious and sad note, I found out via facebook and Connie that Danny Daniel, class of '70 died Sunday from a massive heart attack. He lived in Gwinnett County, had taught and coached for all these years, was well respected among his peers, and was currently on staff at St. Pius. Maybe y'all know where that is. I assume it's Metro Atlanta somewhere. Anyway, very sad. The class of '70 is planning a reunion for this summer. I think when we had ours (thanks to so many of you) it inspired other classes. That's a good thing.

Hugs to all. Your friendships mean so much - honest.

05/06/10 07:46 AM

#1524

Happy, Happy Birthday, Linda! Hope you feel great and are treated great all day long. Tomorrow and the next day, too!

05/06/10 11:16 AM

#1525

Connie Morgan (White)

Happy birthday Linda Wheless Young!

May 6 - National Day of Prayer "...if my people who are called by My name humble themselves and pray, and seek My face and turn from their wicked ways, I will hear from heaven, will forgive their sin and will heal their land" II Chronicles 7:14 God bless America - and may America turn to God...

I've enjoyed reading the forum.. I have found it to be a wealth of knowledge and humor (or something :) )

I do hope you are all having a good spring. I walk out of my door in the mornings to the sweet aroma of jasmine. Just beautiful. I am thankful for much----and my OCHS friends are way up high on the list!!!

Happy Mothers Day wishes go out for all the mothers and all who have been special in the life of a child. I must again voice thankfulness for my precious mother.

Love you guys.

05/06/10 03:24 PM

#1526

HAPPY BIRTHDAY LINDA! I HOPE IT'S A GREAT DAY JUST FOR YOU!!!

NOTHING HAPPENING EXCEPT--------BRAVE WIN! BRAVES WIN!!!

05/06/10 03:48 PM

#1527

http://www.autoblog.com/2010/04/27/puerto-rican-funeral-home-presents-shooting-victim-on-his-motorc/

In light of Gary's recent fascination with the dearly departed... check this out...

05/06/10 04:58 PM

#1528

SORRY DON BUT THAT IS BOUT THE SICKEST THING I THINK I HAVE

EVER SEEN! GUESS YOU CALL THAT A FAST RIDE TO HELL!!! NITE ALL!

05/07/10 09:07 AM

#1529

Happy Belated Birthday Linda. I see you logged on yesterday and hope you come back often.

Today is May 7th and thus my possible recent facination with ways to die. Eight years ago today I underwent surgery for cancer and managed to dodge that bullet. Winston Churchill once said, "There is no more exhilerating feeling than to have been shot at and missed!" AMEN there Winston!!

I hope you all have a very blessed weekend. Later.

05/07/10 10:10 AM

#1530

Sorry Jim, for making you sick with the dead dude on the motorcycle.

Congratulations Gary on the anniversary of surviving a close call with the "Big C".

Thanks Connie for reminding us that our country needs prayer... and lots of it... everyday.

Hope your bruises have healed, Cousin Diane.

Here's wishing all you mothers out there a great Mother's Day!

And may you all have a great weekend.

Reporting live from the Sunny South... and remembering my own sweet Mama... this is Don.

05/07/10 10:44 AM

#1531

GOOD MORNING FOLKS!

THIS IS GOING TO BE A GREAT WEEKEND FOR MY FOLKS. MY

YOUNGEST DAUGHTER RECEIVES HER DEGREE IN NURSING AT

GEORGIA COLLEGE AND STATE UNIVERSITY. WHICH MEANS I

WILL FINALLY BE OUT OF SCHOOL!!! AND WE GET TO CELEBRATE

ONE OF THE BEST HOLIDAYS OF THE YEAR. WE GET TO SHOW

OUR APPRECIATION FOR THE ONE PERSON THAT NO MATTER

HOW MUCH WE DO, THEY ALWAYS ARE THERE FOR US. MY MOTHER

PASSED AWAY 10 YEARS AGO BUT I STILL TALK TO HER. AND ITS

STRANGE BUT I KNOW SHE HEARS. NOW I WATCH MY WIFE WITH

OUR DAUGHTERS. I SEE HER STEADY INFLUENCES ON THEM AND

REALIZE HOW VERY VERY LUCKY I TRULY AM. SO AS WE CELEBRATE

THIS WEEKEND I WANT TO TELL EACH OF YOU MOTHERS JUST HOW

VERY IMPORTANT YOU ARE TO US. AND HOW VERY GRATEFUL I AM

FOR YOU!

HAVE A VERY HAPPY BLESSED MOTHERS DAY!!!

05/07/10 01:32 PM

#1532

Gee, I see that I never signed out from last time, which makes it look like I've been sitting here for a very, very, very long time.

Jim, those words about your wife, and about your mom, were so sweet. I probably speak for all wives and moms in saying the best gift we can ever receive is just a sincere word of appreciation once in a while. I think that's pretty much what anyone longs for--male, female, mom, dad, butcher, baker, or candlestick maker. Encouraging, loving words truly are the best gifts.

Gary, we are all celebrating "that bullet missed you" as you say. As far as I'm concerned, I'll tell you like I tell Dick, that I hope the Lord takes me before him, because I'd miss him so much. I'd miss all of you, too. So take care of yourselves!

Dick and I are heading to Indianapolis for the night to accompany some of our church kids who are involved in a christian leadership convention there. We'll be back tomorrow, so it's a short trip.

I join Don, Jimmy, Gary, and Connie in remembering our mothers. I talk to mine, too, Jimmy. I find myself growing more like her every day, but I can only hope to be half as dear as she was.

Have a good weekend one and all.

05/10/10 10:51 AM

#1533